Four Ridiculous Reasons To Miss College Football Season

Written by Ian | 20 July 2009

There are many reasons for college athletes to miss part or all of a football season.  Football may be the easiest sport in which to overcome a key loss as well.  While losing a star quarterback, running back, or safety may seriously hamper a team, most people will agree that football is a sport that usually packs a little more depth than others.  Today we'll take a look at some of these missing parts for teams this year and how some quirky things can cause players to miss all or part of a football season.  (*Note: not all of these players will miss the entire season, while some may miss no game time at all, but in our opinion they all should.)

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We'll start off with South Florida kicker Maikon Bonani (Brazilian, I know you were wondering).  Bonani will likely have to redshirt this season after falling nearly 4 stories from an amusement park ride this weekend in Tampa.  Maikon was working at the park when he thought the door to a passenger compartment of a ride was improperly secured.  He held onto the door, trying to make sure it was safe for the park-goers, until he was 35 feet off the ground.  He then dropped to the ground sustaining serious, but not life threatening, injuries.  It's tough for this kid to likely end up missing a full year but we'll hope he fully recovers.  He was trying to help people out after all.

Next up we have Anthony Dixon of Mississippi State.  Dixon was recently pulled over and charged with DUI when police found him swerving through parking spaces along the road.  The best part of the story involves the two empty champagne bottles found in Dixon's back seat.  Classy!  Dixon refused a field test but Coach Dan Mullen explains that this issue will be taken care of "within the program."  I suppose that means he'll get away with mostly a hand slap.  By the way, since Mullen took over for Sly Croom there have been 4 alcohol or drug related incidents.  So when is Marvin Lewis taking over the special teams job down there?

Next up we have a player that may not miss time at all, though he should.  Kurt Wermers, former offensive lineman for Cohron's Michigan squad, recently transferred to Ball State.  Wermers cited a lack of family values and suspect recruiting for the reason he transferred.  Let's see what an online bullshit translator has to say about that statement.  "Lack of family values and not getting along with players being recruited" loosely translates to "I wasn't good enough to play there and they were recruiting over my head."  Sounds about right.  Oh, also Wermers was academically ineligible when he decided to transfer.  Son, you made a good choice.  When you're not even good enough to warrant the coaching staff getting you a hot blonde to do your homework it's time to move on.

Finally we'll stay at home for the final analysis of ineligibility.  Jeremy Jarmon from the football Wildcats was ruled ineligible by the NCAA for testing positive for a banned substance.  Jarmon pled ignorant on the matter, and we tend to believe him based on previous conduct, but either way he is off the team and on to the Washington Redskins.  It's understandable that things like this happen when you try to run a 150 person operation like a college football team.  What I hope Coaches Brooks and Phillips take away from this are that there are certain athletes who are at a premium.  All conference defensive ends in the SEC are one of these type of players.  When you have one you had better have someone watching out for that guy 24-7, no matter his typical character.